Folks! My new single ”Där regnet faller” is now out on all platforms. The title is swedish for ”Where the rain falls”. The song is produced by Johan Arveli and the artwork by Isabell Rödén. Enjoy and stay tuned for more!

Cheers!

Tomas

”If you are going through hell, keep going.” ~ Winston Churchill

Journalist Philip Norén from Östersunds-Posten did an article/interview with me in conjunction with the release of ”The Atonement” that got published yesterday. I’ve translated it as well as I can so you can read it here:

Tomas is a perfectionist to his fingertips

Composer Tomas Grut has just released his fifth full-length album ”Chapter V: The Atonement”. He carries a lot of emotions that he gets an outlet for through his music.

– Music works almost like therapy for me, he says.

Tomas Grut himself describes his new, fifth full-length album ”Chapter V: The Atonement” as dreamy, mysterious, majestic, energetic, happy, dramatic and melancholic.

– I think it will appeal to many because it contains very different feelings and expressions, says Tomas Grut.

Disc number five is significantly brighter than his previous work. This is despite the fact that Tomas Grut during parts of the creative process, which ran for about two years, struggled with feelings and thoughts of both guilt and shame in the aftermath of a bad ending to a relationship. He himself describes these feelings as ”a new form of pain”.

Music helps Tomas Grut to handle both difficult and joyful emotions. That has always been the case, he says. The making of the album has served as a kind of therapy.

– It is important to try to disconnect the thinking. If you think too much you can often go wrong and you can get stuck in what you’re doing. I try to go by instinct and by my feelings in what I do.

I personally have a strong belief that tragedies and darkness in life breed creativity. Do you agree on that?

– I think there is a lot to it. But when I make the best music and when I’m the most creative, I am neither too deep at the bottom and do not feel too good either. Not ”submarine mode” as I call it but more slightly depressed. If I feel too bad, I can barely walk or stand, then it is difficult to make music!

In his creation, Tomas Grut tries to dedicate his entire presence to his music entirely. The fingers dance frantically over the keys and out of the piano comes heavenly piano melodies that testify to both pain and joy.

Would you say that your inner feelings are reflected in the music you create?

– Yes. However, it does not have to reflect my mood for the moment. For example, some of the most depressing pieces I have made, I have made when I have been very happy and some of my happiest pieces I have made when I have been depressed.

During the time that Tomas Grut was working on the new record, he found out, after a neuropsychiatric evaluation, that he has both autism and also ADD. He is clear that it is very important to talk about mental health – especially as a man.

– I have no problem talking about my mental health and I will continue doing so, he says.

How have the diagnoses affected you?

– I do not want to romanticize disabilities and I can almost get provoked by this ”superpower-dialogue” going on. In my case, I see it more as a gift and a curse.

Tomas Grut thinks that he has learned to accept his shortcomings as a human being and tries to live with the diagnoses rather than let them become obstacles.

– I have had a lot to process and accept. And then we have this with trying to see the positive in the seemingly negative. I think I’m pretty good at doing so.

Another approach that Tomas Grut has used to learn to accept his diagnoses has been to focus on the fact that he is in good company when it comes to creative greats with different types of diagnoses.

– Glenn Gould, who is the best pianist who has ever lived. He had both autism and tourettes. You can even hear his tics if you listen carefully to his recordings, says Tomas Grut.

– I probably have the diagnoses to thank a lot for my musicality. I almost have to believe it to be able to handle it.

Tomas Grut says that he has never worked so intensively with a record as he did when he created ”The Atonement”. In fact, he became so absorbed in the music that the piano keys eventually began to make a physical impact on his body.

– I got blisters on my fingers because I played so much haha.

Do you feel that your music must be perfect before then daring to let go of it?

– Yeah, I do, it’s also a bit of a gift and a curse. I am very picky and I have almost had to accept that I will never be 100 % completely satisfied, says Tomas Grut and at the same time says that he is satisfied with the new album.

– But I chase something that is perfect and masterful, but it feels like it will never happen

Now you are just done with a new record that has just been released. How are you feeling now?

– I feel a bit exhausted and my ”hard drive” is empty on ideas. It is a mixture of emptiness and sadness but also relief and joy of course. As it usually feels and should feel. I think it will take quite a long time before I start making new music. But I’ve said that before.

– Now I’ll probably just try to enjoy and celebrate.

Now Tomas Grut is looking forward to playing his new pieces in front of a live audience.

My 5th full-length album ”Chapter V: The Atonement” is now available on all platforms. l’ve worked very hard on it and I hope you all enjoy it for many years!

A big thanks go out to producer Johan Arveli, photoprapher Åke Remén and violinst/alto violinist Peter Roos among others.

Cheers

T

”If you are going through hell, keep going.” ~ Winston Churchill

My new album ”Chapter V: The Atonement” will be available on every digital streaming- and download service on April 20th!

What can I say about it?… Well, I can at least tell you that it’s a bit brighter than my latest outing but not that much! There’s some really dark and melancholic stuff on it. And the songs are a bit longer than normal. The album length is 41 minutes but it’s only 9 songs on the album.

During the time I was working on this album I struggled with the after effects of a pretty bad breakup and then the Corona came which affected me a lot (like it did with everyone) and about a year later I went through a withdrawal phase from a medicine I took a bit to often which escalated a lot during the pandemic so I had to kick it and that was… stuff of nightmares. Damn. I still can’t understand how I didn’t lose my mind for real. I mean, I’m always a bit crazy but I’ve never been crazy-crazy so to speak which means that I must have a pretty strong mind. I also found out during a neuropsychiatric evaluation I did in Stockholm that I have both autism (mildest form) and also ADD (2nd degree) which I had (and still has) to process and accept. I’ve also dealt with a lot of guilt during the time making the record and that was really hard cause that was also basically new to me. A new form of pain. Therefore I felt that the title ”The Atonement” was fitting.

So, despite this album being a bit brighter than the last one, I’ve been through some pretty rough times and this album has been working (as always) as a sort of therapy for me. But many positive and really beautiful things have happened along the way too! I share with you the tracklist for the album below plus this teaser.

I must say that there’s some really cool stuff on this record. It’s dreamy, mystical, magestic, it has energy, joy, power, drama, sadness, melancholy, and armageddon-ish atmosphere at times. A lot of feelings. I can’t wait for you to hear it. I really put my heart in this one. Actually I practiced and played so much during the rough work that I both got blisters (!) on my fingers and a severe necklock haha.

Tracklist:

1. Full of Life
2. Grand
3. Divided Spirit
4. Sognante
5. Through the Storm
6. Deceiving Light
7. The World That Never Was
8. Epiphany
9. Always / Never

So, April 20th. ”Chapter V: The Atonement”. Mark your calenders!

Over and out

T

”If you are going through hell, keep going.” ~ Winston Churchill

Culture journalist Jeanette Fundin did an article about me a week ago in Östersunds-Posten and it got published today. I translated it as well as I could so you can read it here:

Composer and pianist Tomas Grut from Östersund will release a new album next year. His fifth.

– Every time I can make music, I am surprised, he says

Tomas Grut released his first album ten years ago. Then he thought it would be a one-time event. But that did not happen. At regular intervals, this creative Östersund-born has come up with new material.

– After every record I have released, I have thought that this will be the last one I do because I do not think I can come up with something new or that it might just be a bad copy of what I did before.

Composing music is a time consuming and sometimes strenuous work.

– When you have released a record and have worked very hard, there can be a big emptiness afterwards.

Tomas Grut says that it is his fans who make him find joy in continuing with the music.

– It’s fun with affirmation of course. It is people all over the world who get in touch and tell all sorts of stories. I’ve even heard that my music has saved lives. Then it feels as if you really have to continue, he says.

Tomas Grut, who has studied composition and has a university degree in music and sound design, explains that it is sometimes difficult to find balance in his work.

– In one moment I can be self-critical in an almost handicapping way, but in the next moment I can feel an arrogance that I have to slow down. This split is what his latest single Divided Spirit is about.

– It is probably not that unusual among creative people to feel this division. That in one moment you are in an anxious shaking fetal position basically and in the other moment you almost become arrogant and need to slow yourself down. It is dangerous to get hubris as an artist, he says with a laugh.

But the piece Divided Spirit also reflects the time we live in.

– It feels really divided between right and left, anti-vaxxers and pro-vaxxers, misogyny and misandry and so on. It’s unique in modern times.

Tomas Grut is happy that he can reach out with his music. His audience is constantly increasing.

– If I’ve done the math right I will have half a million streams on Spotify this year alone if it continues like this. In the beginning, I could count my fans on one hand basically.

He has good contact with the fans and is often told that his music helps them in different ways.

– I have a need to express myself in music and that is why I return to it. It has this healing effect both on myself and others. It is a way for me to manage my health, I have struggled a lot with mental illness, he says.